" HOW TO SAVE YOUR LIFE "

Have you ever experienced a situation, friendship or serious relationship where no matter how much you try and care and work on making things right, that somehow it ends up back to feeling all wrong instead?

The other night I found myself feeling pretty low about someone very special to me who I was losing because of a domino effect of miscommunications. I didn’t know if this was because it's full moon which we got into this all the time each time , if I was the one screwed up, or WHAT! I just understood at the time that I was feeling very MIS understood.

I've been asking advices from great intuitive friend and she were kind enough to email me on her busy schedules...She is always there when i needed her the most. Another confirmation that we ARE each other’s angels :-)


Her thoughts were about a past break up of a very significant and special relationship to her. Over the course of time, she began to realize that despite all the wonderful goodness that existed in that connection to her lover, she simply couldn’t be her ‘healthy self’ and thrive as a joyful, peaceful, & positive person as long as they remained a couple.

Those words drove home to me a truth that I’d been ignoring about my own situation, which is very similar. Though both of us were good people, and we each had the capacity for deep love and loyal honesty in a relationship; for some reason, together, our issues had intertwined in ways where we couldn’t be ‘our healthy selves’. At least I know that due to everything I’d been going through, I couldn’t be MY healthy self.

WHAT EXACTLY IS HEALTHY SELF??

I thought of this for a long time after. I know that a big part of it is to live as close to the ideals I believe in, and to maintain a sense of inner balance and outer honesty. I need to feel free to express my unique thoughts and opinions, and to have friendships I enjoy, and to make choices that are important to my spiritual growth and life’s path.

I really, truly with great emotional effort ‘fight fair’ and try never to burn any bridges with my words and actions. When I’m interacting with someone who is working on the opposite side of how I’m striving to be, this triggers the bitchy witch side of me, the capacity within me to hurt someone’s feelings and sabotage my inner peace. I find myself doing and saying things that I don’t want to do; things which perpetuate a feeling of not liking myself very much.

Thus, if after many attempts to communicate in fairness and kindness with someone I care deeply about, yet the pattern continues . . . I must admit out loud that something isn’t working right anymore. I just can’t be my ‘healthy self’! This often finds me in an emotional trap with someone who isn’t always acting in the benefit of my highest good.

In fact, most healing and the transformation of spirit-mind-body can’t begin to occur unless I see the reflections I’ve created of myself - in the mirror of our chaotic relationship situation- unless I allow myself to back away from hurtful drama.

I’m SO not perfect & I love my friend very much. I wish it could have turned out another way because there has always been so much potential . . . isn’t there always great potential when this sort of connection exists between two people?

It comes down to the basics of soul survival 101 - I see this now, and thank you for waking me up to this my dearest friend. . . if I’d kept going in that dramatic direction I’d be compromising my healthy self (and my friend’s healthy self, too). To break off the pattern of what was occuring time and again with us - this friendship needed to disconnect, at least for now.I'm a firm believer that.... "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." You must do the thing you think you cannot do."


So cheers to YOUR healthy self and MY healthy self and to EVERYONE's healthy self on this brisk fall day!


Peace,
Ann

"There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go".


I love this song and I think the song is about taking a STEP ONE....whatever your choices or purpose in life whether moving forward, taking in control of your life, stay in a relationship,etc...It's always the first step and taking action and always keeping yourself GROUNDED.Joy and Pains are always together we wouldn't truly know how to love if we wont feel the great pain that comes along with it.

FRAY- "HOW TO SAVE A LIFE"