Tuesday, June 22, 2010

JUST WHAT I NEED TO UNDERSTAND MORE TODAY

The definition for Denial is . . .

Denial is the refusal to acknowledge the existence or severity of unpleasant external realities or internal thoughts and feelings.

Basic survival instincts and what Freud believed to be the two dominant human drives: sex and aggression. He called his the "Id"

So if the Id was all we had . . . we would continue to strive to increase pleasure, decrease pain and achieve immediate gratification.

According to Freud there are three parts to us . . .

1. Id - Pleasure
2. Ego - Reality
3. Super Ego - Morality

The Ego sits between the Id and the Super Ego . . . it has a constant battle between pleasure seeking and the morality of getting that please.

For Example . . . There is this really cute person. They are showering you with attention. There is a spark . . . But they are married!

So the Ego bounces back and forth between Id and Super Ego. It bounces and bounces. The relationship gets more pleasurable, more fun . . . but that Super Ego also starts getting activated too! So the poor little ego starts getting stressed out. This causes ANXIETY.

The Ego tries to balance these two . . . and as the anxiety raises . . . it has a whole bag of defense mechanisms. As the ego uses blaming others, or explaining away the problem . . . it also uses a VERY effective tool called DENIAL! THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!!!

LOL!

Denial can become acute to the point of needing a therapist.

Death of a relationship is great breeding ground for denial. The Id wants to continue having pleasure, the Super Ego is say, "NO go . . . Let GO, it is OVER".

So the Anxiety raises, the EGO pulled DENIAL out of the bag of defense mechanisms . . . and we have a person who cannot let go.

Severe cases will develop stalking, mental illness, depression . . . Long, on going denial with develop personality disorders.

Personality Disorder - Long-standing, deeply ingrained patterns of social behavior that are detrimental to those who display them or to others.

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