Something to Ponder...

"The greatest evil that can befall man is that he should come to think ill of himself."


"If we don’t forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and others for the wounds they have inflicted upon us, we end up crippled with guilt. And the soul cannot grow under a blanket of guilt, because guilt is isolating, while growth is a gradual process of reconnection to ourselves, to other people, and to a larger whole."

My Own Pursuit of Happiness ....

" Into the house where joy lives, happiness will gladly come." - Japanese Proverb.


Today i recieved an Awesome message just for me on my facebook - all this messages serves as an inspirational motivations for me each day. I can't let the day pass without checking it. and Mind you , sometimes it's hard to believe but those messages are truly intuned on my present situation. GOD IS GREAT , HE IS MY ROCK , MY SAVIOUR AND HE WILL CONTINUE TO PROVIDE FOR ME AND MY CHILDREN...Amen!

Ann On this day Sept.29 GOD WANTS YOU TO KNOW... that you have to pass through a dark night of the soul. Everyone does, including you. A time comes when what you have always believed is true melts away underneath you. When you cast in doubt even the most obvious, the most simple. When it seems that dark night is a...ll around, and you are all alone. Take heart, this journey through abyss is the final barrier before your emergence into the heavenly light of a new synthesis of your being. God is waiting for you on the other side.


It is almost over been through this windy and dark road....God is truly waiting for us to come home. Moving to CALI very very soon and I strongly believed that once I get there that things will starts to fall into place as God Intent to do.

Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann



Cat- At some point you will realize that you have done too much for someone, that the only next possible step to do is to stop. Leave them alone... Walk away... It’s not like you’re giving up, and it’s not like you shouldn’t try. It’s just that you have to draw the line of determination from desperation. What is truly yours... will eventually be yours, and what is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.You going to CALI will give you alot of positive energy being around your family and friends. We are all there for you Ann - just like when we were growing up. Let go of those non sense peeps - they are not worth your time and your love. You are always the sweet girl next door type and Men is never a problem to you , they all come to you from different directions. I am a living proof of that. Love you Sis and I can't wait to make some more great unforgettable memories with you !! Be Strong just like you always are.

Expectations......

Are what cause so many issues in our friendships and relationships.....
We have many unrealistic expectations of people, most they are blissfully unaware of....

When we do not tell the other person about what we expect we are being unreasonable to expect them to read our mind and know what we want from them.
Sometimes we do not tell the other person what we want or need from them because we are afraid they will reject us or not meet them....and that can be an issue because resentment can build up and cause stress where there should be none. It was OUR own expectations that caused this not the other person not meeting them.

The real problem ONLY begins if we tell the other person what we want and or need from them and that person ignores our wants and needs. Because we have stated our needs, and we have not had them met....

Because we have made our needs clear and are expecting the other person to meet them, that is different from us expecting the other to read our minds....
But what is a reasonable expectation of another human being? Somehow the more we care the more we expect from someone and have no idea that it is ONLY the fact that we care about that person that makes us feel we deserve more from them....because IF we did not care the words a person says or does not say do not have the power to hurt us....it really IS as simple as that....

So keep your expectations realistic, state them clearly, address issues before they really become one, pick your battles, but do not turn them INTO battles, and be honest both with yourself and the other person....

Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann

( AWESOME IRISH BAND!!! )

When we're Young .....

LOVE THIS SONG...the meaning comes so clear to me, but yet its so hard to explain it...for me, it feels like its talking about all the things you imagined adult hood to be when you were young and all the things you hoped to be...but then you grew up and saw it wasnt like that. It just means getting back to what is important in your life and realizing what makes you happy, even if it takes time to go back years and years to get to the simplicity of things "when you were young"....

Sending You all Love and Light,
Ann




Missy- Awesome song sis! and so true... We humans are Fallible creatures, we make mistakes and poor choices and so are the people around us, forgiving not only the ones who had hurt us, but more importantly ourselves is the key to personal growth.... It's what makes our imperfection worthy. Forgiving even those who had hurt us the most. "When we were young" we're full of innocense, we grow up and we learned a lot from our own experience... And we still look back some time to the "When we were young" Days... but with full awareness and wisdom.. at times, we find ourselves thinking "Wow..without so and so pain, I wouldn't have grown up this way" And it's the meaning of life. I love you and will see you soon sis! My hats off to you by the way! You hadn't changed all these years, still the same Good hearted Ann I've known 20 years or so ago. "When we were young" ;)

RAVE, TECHNO , FREE STYLE AND TRANCE DAYS

To all my RAVE friends in Switzerland , Tokyo-Roppongi Japan, Bay Area , South Sac.... Here's ONE NIGHT IN BANGKOK !!!

I Miss our wild and wet nights... dancing all night long!!!


Muahhhh!!!

Ann

Thought of the day

" Through perseverance many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure."

Happy Sunday to you all.. .Just got back from my Chiro as my everyday Theraphy.. More Packing to do but we're getting in there...Doing the count down.


Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann

I LOVE THIS SONG!!!

We can't change the wind But we can adjust our sail.

Nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before
And if I ever need someone to come along
Who's gonna comfort me and keep me strong

We are all rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on comin' and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day

Tookude iki wo shiteru toumei ni nattamitai
Kurayami ni omoe takedo mekaku shisarete tadake
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made

Nobody knows who I really am
Maybe they just don't give a damn
But if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me, and keep me strong

Hito no kokoro wa utsuri yuku nukedashita kunaru
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo tsureteku

And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore

Oh, I can see the shore
When will I... see the shore?

I want you to know who I really am
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you
And if you ever need someone to come along
I will follow you, and keep you strong

Tabi wa mada tsudzuiteku odayakana hi mo
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo terashidasu
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made

And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore

Unmei no fune wo kogi
Nami wa tsugi kara tsugi e to
Watashitachi wo osou kedo
Sore mo suteki na tabi ne
Dore mo suteki na tabi ne

Full Moon Sept 23rd ...Today is a great day to harvest.

On this day Sept. 23 , God wants you to know ... that when you focus on problems, you will have more problems. When you focus on possibilities, you will have more opportunities.


It is a day to complete things and bring closure to any situation .It can be a positive, healthy crop, or harvesting an issue and getting it out of your field so that you can move on to a healthier one.

This is the perfect day energetically to get that harvest in, and to then open a door to be able to move on.

When others have closed the door, allow it to remain closed and move forward with a new crop, with new ideas, goals and a new attitude.

You can harvest by finishing up a project, or a mindset.You can harvest the tangible or intangible.

Remember to not rush things. All good things take time.Patience is the lesson taught by the Universe most often as it is the most important lesson we will learn on this earth.

What can you harvest today?


Sending you all Alot of Love and Light,
Ann


The full moon on September 23rd will fall in the sign of Aries. Aries is the sign that likes to be adventurous and outgoing. It's a great time to take chances and risks to see what results you get. Gambles are highlighted here. I don't mean the gambles of money and the casino. I mean the gambles of taking chances in life. You need to explore and venture out into the world. The adventures can take you to a place or company or career field that is different and unique from what you are use to. The full moon is the first of two full moon affecting you. Saturn will oppose this full moon making you work hard to accomplish your goals. You may be investing more time and effort in order to advance. It could be a time of changes and obligations. You will find yourself investing more time and effort to get ahead. Saturn is the sign od discipline and obligations so expect to buckly down and get to work. You may feel a bit stressed, depressed or anxious at this time too. Pluto also seem to be adding more pressures and frustrations. It will square this full moon which could make you feel a bit emotional and sensitive. The full moon will affect mainly everyone who was born around the 20th through 27th of any sign and from any month. Everyone will feel the affects from this full moon but more so those born around those days.

My BEST FRIENDS... My SISTERS!!!

I am Happy to be Reconnected once again via Facebook with my Bestfriends and my sisters growing up from my highschool and college days back home in the Philippines.

After more than 20 yrs...Finally seeing each other soon in CALI.

I MISS YOU MY SISTERS!!!! WE HAD WONDERFUL MEMORIES TOGETHER THAT WILL ALWAYS STAYS IN US. WE CRIED, WE LAUGHED , WE DANCED AND SING TOGETHER.


FRIENDSHIP IS A PRICELESS GIFT
THAT CANNOT BE BOUGHT OR SOLD
BUT ITS VALUE IS FAR GREATER
THAN THE MOUNTAIN MADE OF GOLD
FOR GOLD IS COLD & LIFELESS
IT CAN NEITHER SEE NOR HEAR
& IN THE TIME OF TROUBLE
IT IS POWER LESS TO CHEER--
IT HAS NO EARS TO LISTEN
NOR HEART TO UNDERSTAND
IT CANNOT BRING U CONFORT
OR REACH OUT A HELPING HAND
SO WHEN U ASK
GOD FOR A GIFT
BE THANKFUL IF HE SENDS
NOT DIAMONDS, PEARLS OR RICHES
BUT THE LOVE OF REAL TRUE FRIENDS



MISSY ( Miramar ,CA)



***They called us the " HOTTIES" in highschool - we were in our freshmen year then . I remembered alot of girls especially 11th and 12th graders HATES US- LOL!! We've both dated guys in 12th grade- that was a slapped in the face on them - hahah. As Missy kept reminding me even on this day about my killer smile that leaves guys broken hearted ( yeah right!) . And Missy's " pato " (duck) ass makes the guys drool too !! I can't wait to ride on your Harley girl crusin' all over-- hell yeah!!! Ohh gee, We are ready for our 25th Highschool Reunion next year in the Philippines. Girl , I'm not sure if this is a good thing, hahah***



SHIELA ( Rancho Cucamonga, CA)



***Ohhh Sheila....The cutie and the brain!! I'm gonna be nice here and not gonna mention any of our wild rendezvous in 11th and 12th grades. She is the Strong one , the fighter , never scared of anyone. We used to dive on things and just do it - what the heck was our motto.We dated guys belongs in the same family like my boyfriends cousin or guys from the same Catholic boys school. We found it just easy , haha no not really it just happens and we never realized it til later....double date all the time!!... And the Party continues, when i get there!! My Parents 2nd fave they always concern and worry about her wondering if she is ok***



MARY ANN ( San Jose, CA)



***My So fragile sister whom i thought alot of not so good but not so bad things. Wow I was banned to come over to her parents house for awhile -lol. But hey they managed to keep me there for days without being noticed...ohhh yeah i thought her how to be snicky! We have so much memories - she is definitely like my sister. We took her to any of my family gatherings. We're always there for each other. MY PARENTS FAVE still up to this days they always checking up on her ***

JANE ( Canada )



***Jane, the Shy one ..our memories back in College and summer time was Unforgettable. All the " Men " around Us, chased Us and Men we broke their hearts, left them hangin'...Oh well. We've both been through alot , we shared our dreams in life and comforted one another at all times.The Parties...Ok i will stop here... haha ***

CAT ( Cannot disclosed per request, lol- that's cat for you!)



***OMG!! I recieved a call from her last week wanting me to guess, it only took me 2 mins. after not speaking to her since 1986 - I freaking remember that slutty voice- lol! My mom loves her at first but later she started telling me that Cat is a bad influenced for me. Yeah !! She thought me cut classes in highschool- yeap! We watched some movies , hang out , see the boys all the time. All we did is to LAUGH , LAUGH EVEN HARDER!!! Didn't care about anyone or anything else other than We are Happy!!***

***OUR SONG FOREVER***

Are You Attracted To Dangerous Men?

An open letter to women and men frustrated with dating

Can I ask you something personal?
Be honest...

Have you ever dated the type of guy or gal that left you constantly waiting by the phone with an uneasy sick feeling in the pit of your stomach? Be honest now!

Or a guy/gal who made you feel bad about yourself, but for some reason you couldn’t leave him/her? (Of course, that same guy or gal, at times, also made you feel like you were the only person on this planet - you know, that “hot-cold” type).

And have you ever walked into a club and found yourself so attracted to one particular guy or gal, you felt like you were in a trance and literally couldn't stop making eyes with them?

If you answered yes to any of the above, it may be a sign that you’re susceptible to a certain “dangerous personality type” that psychiatrists have a SCARY sounding name for ... I'll tell you about that in a minute!

I want you to quickly read through the following list of personality traits and jot down the ones that apply to either the guy or gal you’re dating now or guys or gals you’ve typically dated in the past:

Turns out there's a BIG difference between a "normal" guy you might date and a sociopath (a sociopath actually has something wrong with their conscience - they either don't have one or it’s severely fragmented).


Sociopaths only care about fulfilling their own needs and desires - selfishness and egocentricity to the extreme. Everything and everybody else is mentally twisted around in their minds as objects to be used in fulfilling their own needs and desires.

Not surprisingly, parental failure is the #1 reason why someone develops a sociopathic personality.

Also interesting are the four distinct types of sociopaths (sound like anyone you've dated?):

1) Commons are characterized by their lack of conscience

2) Alienated are characterized by their inability to love or be loved

3) Aggressives are characterized by a consistent sadistic streak

4) Dyssocials are characterized by an inability to abide by normal rules



Here are other personality traits to watch out for:

PERSONALITY TRAITS:


1. SUPERFICIAL CHARM -- the tendency to be smooth, engaging, charming, and slick. Not in the least shy, self-conscious, or afraid to say anything. He/she never gets tongue-tied and has freed him/herself from the social conventions in taking turns in talking, for example.


2. GRANDIOSE SELF-WORTH -- a grossly inflated view of one's abilities and self-worth, self-assured, opinionated, cocky, a braggart. An arrogant guy/gal who believes he/she is a superior human being.


3. NEED FOR STIMULATION (PRONENESS TO BOREDOM) -- an excessive need for novel, thrilling, and exciting stimulation; taking chances and doing things that are risky. Often has low self-discipline in carrying tasks through to completion because he gets bored easily.



4. PATHOLOGICAL LYING -- can be moderate or high; in moderate form, and will be shrewd, crafty, cunning, sly, and clever (in extreme form, he will be deceptive, deceitful, underhanded, unscrupulous, manipulative, and dishonest).


5. CONNING AND MANIPULATIVENESS -- the use of deceit and deception to cheat, con, or defraud others for personal gain; distinguished from Item #4 in the degree to which exploitation and callous ruthlessness is present, as reflected in a lack of concern for the feelings and suffering of one's victims.


6. LACK OF REMORSE OR GUILT -- a lack of feelings or concern for the losses, pain, and suffering of victims; a tendency to be unconcerned, dispassionate, coldhearted, and unempathic. This item is usually demonstrated by a disdain for one's victims.


7. SHALLOW AFFECT -- emotional poverty or a limited range or depth of feelings; interpersonal coldness in spite of signs of open gregariousness.


8. CALLOUSNESS and LACK OF EMPATHY -- a lack of feelings toward people in general; cold, contemptuous, inconsiderate, and tactless.


9. PARASITIC LIFESTYLE -- an intentional, manipulative, selfish, and exploitative financial dependence on others as reflected in a lack of motivation, low self-discipline, and inability to begin or complete responsibilities.


10. POOR BEHAVIORAL CONTROLS -- expressions of irritability, annoyance, impatience, threats, aggression, and verbal abuse; inadequate control of anger and temper; acting hastily.



11. PROMISCUOUS SEXUAL BEHAVIOR -- a variety of brief, superficial relations, numerous affairs, and an indiscriminate selection of sexual partners; the maintenance of several relationships at the same time; a history of attempts to sexually coerce others into sexual activity or taking great pride at discussing sexual exploits or conquests.


12. LACK OF REALISTIC, LONG-TERM GOALS -- an inability or persistent failure to develop and execute long-term plans and goals; a nomadic existence, aimless, lacking direction in life.


13. IMPULSIVITY -- the occurrence of behaviors that are unpremeditated and lack reflection or planning; inability to resist temptation, frustrations, and urges; a lack of deliberation without considering the consequences; foolhardy, rash, unpredictable, erratic, and reckless.


14. IRRESPONSIBILITY -- repeated failure to fulfill or honor obligations and commitments; such as not paying bills, defaulting on loans, performing sloppy work, being absent or late to work, failing to honor contractual agreements.


15. FAILURE TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN ACTIONS -- a failure to accept responsibility for one's actions reflected in low conscientiousness, an absence of dutifulness, antagonistic manipulation, denial of responsibility, and an effort to manipulate others through this denial.



16. MANY SHORT-TERM RELATIONSHIPS -- a lack of commitment to a long-term relationship reflected in inconsistent, undependable, and unreliable commitments in life, including marital.


17. JUVENILE DELINQUENCY -- behavior problems between the ages of 13-18; mostly behaviors that are crimes or clearly involve aspects of antagonism, exploitation, aggression, manipulation, or a callous, ruthless tough-mindedness.


18. CRIMINAL VERSATILITY -- A diversity of types of criminal offenses (regardless if the person has been arrested or convicted for them); taking great pride at getting away with crimes.

Do any of these personality traits describe someone you've dated or are dating?

If you answered yes, then you may be as surprised as I was to learn that all 18 traits are actually “clinical traits” of a sociopath (Source: Psychopathy Checklist-Revised, PCL-R; Hare,1991, 2003)... and IF you’ve dated guys with these traits, chances are YOU are attracted to or involved with a SOCIOPATH... yikes!

Now before you freak out too much… I want you to know that you're not alone!

I too was attracted to atleast one " one of a kind " (no wonder my relationships with him only brought me heartache and pain!)…

Turns out there's a BIG difference between a "normal" guy you might date and a sociopath (a sociopath actually has something wrong with their conscience - they either don't have one or it’s severely fragmented).

Sociopaths only care about fulfilling their own needs and desires - selfishness and egocentricity to the extreme. Everything and everybody else is mentally twisted around in their minds as objects to be used in fulfilling their own needs and desires.

RELATIONSHIPS...A Divine Design !

It's funny how as humans we tend at times to focus on the wrongs done to us, ignoring the wrongs we have done to others. When we focus on how in our lives we were the victims of someone else's poor choices and behaviors towards us, we trap ourselves in stasis, thus preventing true growth. Instead of righting the wrongs we have done to someone we care for a great deal, we sometimes over compensate by lavishing our time and attention on new people that we bring into our lives thinking that this will fix our past poor behavior.

The only way to truly grow and thrive in relationships is not to make a mess of things and walk away, but to return to pick up the pieces of what once was. This is where growth and satisfaction reside. Leaving a trail of broken relationships and friendships behind, haunts the soul that wishes to grow.

Spiritual growth involves doing what's right, not what is easy.

All good spiritual leaders have shown us this. Being a good partner or friend takes a great deal of effort because it requires trust in ourselves and faith in the power of love. It's hard for some people to believe that they are truly loveable. This feeling is often times the result of harsh childhoods where parents were overly critical and withheld true affection and praise.

Many people are the victims of poor parenting which if they allow it, will affect the quality of their relationships throughout their lives. Fortunately as adults our parents no longer control our lives as long as we don't let them. By focusing on past hurts done by our parents we continue to give them power over us. By being able to reject the notion that somehow got implanted in our young brains, that we are not worthy of love, we can move forward into much happier, healthier relationships then we had as children.

As adults we truly have power over our lives to create strong bonds and loving relationships that reflect our own inner beauty. When we allow ourselves to really feel our emotions, we open ourselves up to incredible experiences. When our heart chakra is able to function properly, we find ourselves equipped with a new sense of the beauty of the people we care for, and a feeling of peace and patience with them.

What makes love the most powerful emotion is that it empowers us as individuals not only to a true sense of peace and joy, but the ability to heal and forgive wounds inflicted upon us. In turn, there becomes a desire to do the same for those whom we have inflicted wounds. Allowing ourselves to feel love is the best gift we can give ourselves. When we trust in our ability to love, then we trust that the people we love deserve the work it takes to keep things in balance, and when things shatter, to pick up the pieces with them and redesign the relationship.

I just got done watching a very touching video of a good friend of mine jenny back in Catholic school St . Rita back home. She shared to us a a weekend Marriage Encounter she and her husband Erwin had in one of the beautiful Island in the Philippines. I think if only marriage couples have some spiritual time just for themselves , giving time to reflect on things that they have for one another. Here in America, we are always busy working , doing other things that we forget the most important people in ourlives.. our love ones. So many distractions that pulling each others apart. The Lying, the nagging , the dishonesty etc.. i could go on ...
Our EGO and PRIDE gets in the way that we forgot the love that brought US together. We then not only lose ourself but our partners as well.

WHAT MAKES A HAPPY HOME???? TREAT EACH OTHER WITH LOVE AND RESPECT.

Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann

You are a beautiful human being, Ann !!!

Here is a beautiful message for you today my filipina friend :

The Angels of Protection and Beauty wants to help you in every way to simplify your life so that you may find happiness and love in all the things you do. They want you to be willing to take care of yourself, treat yourself with the most care and concern. Not to look elsewhere or in someone to give you the love, care and concern you truly desire.

You are a beautiful human being, your inner child yearns for your love, attention, and passion of life. Today, your inner child wants to feel some nurturing. Take a walk outdoors, relax in your favorite chair, lay on the floor and take some deep breaths, call on your Angels for help and assistance in all areas of your life and well-being.

Remember nothing is too hard or too difficult for the Angels.

You may think there is some special way to connect with your Angels. All you have to do is simply ' ASK THEM ' out loud or mentally for help and they will begin. Remember once you ask, work on letting it go to the higher realms so they can take care of it and your request.

When you work on your relationship with YOU, all your other relationships begin to shift and get better!

YOU ARE VERY LOVED!

Blessings to you and yours~
W.B.D.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~~*~*~*~*~~*

Thank you so much my friend... OMG , I am Speechless!!! Yeah, I've been around some negative people and I refused to be back there again. They made me forget who I really am ...I've been so busy of only them then worsts they dragged me along with their misery.
I know I am beautiful person inside and out and still being reminded by my friends growing up back home. It is time!! Enough is Enough from those people!!
I choose to be HAPPY and BE BEAUTIFUL again.

Love and Light,
Ann

We have something in common!!!

Ok I have to blog this one ! This is not the very first time i was actually told i look like the person... I am not going to elaborate even more what happened today but it was so funny and I recieved a message on my facebook too!!

Ok anyone would know Tia Carrere is right? Well, Someone sent me her pics along with my pics that was copied from my facebook profile.

Tia Carrera grew up in Hawaii but She is A Chinese , Filipino , Spanish descent.


Maria Antonette is A Chinese ,Filipino and Spanish descent as well.


TIA


ANN



LMAO!! Enough!!! I'm Gluttoning here.. heheh..I am in heaven now ohhhhh 'kkkkkkk.
Well Thanks by the way to everyone who thinks all these years that I do look like her. Although back home in the Philippines when i was in my college days , I was told few times that i do look like Tetchie Agbayani ( A Filipina Playboy centerfold in the 70's i think). Unfortunately, At that time i wasn't really proud about it, due to back home during that time filipino thinks she was a disgraced to our country. and Of course, my boyfriend then think it was so eeffinggg HOT that people say that i do look like her!


I was surprised that i was also asked tonight.. what's my plan?? At firsts i was...wtf???
Ok ,,Here's my plan...First of all, Well, Im hoping and praying that my back will get straighten out soon ,
Like I said from my other blog alot of what happened 10 yrs ago is repeating itself!
Therefore, I am going to start taking care of ME NOW for awhile,
Meaning back to the gym and then, Back in the Saddle again, whatever that means!! LOL
That's when i get back to CA baby!!! (so watch out!)




Well, Someday i will have my legacy continues that would carry on my looks and talents...my 2 beautiful daughters...Angeliviv and Aisha... Beauty and Brain....German, Russian, Italian, Scottish, Filipino, Chinese, Spanish BEAUTIES...did i forget anything???

Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann

Thought for the day

"If a fellow isn't thankful for what he's got,

He isn't likely to be thankful for what he's going to get."

Beautiful day , had a some color today - lol

Feeling a little bit better - Ready to go back to work.
And I can't wait to get back in the Saddle baby, Heeeyyyeeeeeahhhhh!!!

Me and My Baby Big Boy James....

Love and Light,
Ann

Thought for The Day....

“To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.” Woody Allen

A lot of truth there, isn't there? LOL. But when you think about it, he's dead on. To love IS to suffer, to love IS to be happy, so are we all emotionally programmed to be masochists?

Who among us has not found that in order to really "feel" love, we also must know pain. It's a vicious cycle, isn't it? In order to fully experience love, one must be willing to risk pain. Most of us do find it worthwhile to take that risk. So I guess Mr. Allen is correct in that we do love to suffer! LOL!

Hope that your Friday is bringing you a bright start to a Happy Weekend!

Sending you all alot of Love and Light,
Ann

Learning why you attract the people that you love in your life

( Thanks Dr. D this is very helpful to alot of Us)

I have been trying to write this blog all day. The hardest thing for people to understand that the person that they have attracted into their lives is exactly who they think they deserve. It is a hard pill to swallow when the relationship is going through rough times. Remember that no one can make you feel a certain way. Only you can make yourself feel a certain way and it is all based on your interpretation of the situation.

FIRST OF ALL.........
The initial attraction to a person serves as a way to hook you into the situation. What you find out later about the person is what you are dealing with inside. Yes people express their issues differently but the issues are the same. What frustrates you about the person that you love is what you need to heal within yourself.

If your partner is not honest, emotionally available, cheating, angry,etc. These are the issues that you must heal. You have to heal trust, being totally emotionally present meaning say what you really feel. Not saying how you feel because you are afraid of losing them is the same as not being honest. We constantly mimic what our partner is putting out to us. Remember we just have a different way of expressing it.

It is easy to bash the other party and say that they are wrong or they need to change,etc. if you do a Byron Katie worksheet, it will come back to you also. So learn not to bash your partner because they are your mirror. What you say about them, you have to say about yourself. We are always in perfect alignment with whom we love/dating.

If you find yourself focusing on their flaws, look at how those flaws exist in you. THIS EXERCISE IS NOT ABOUT BEING RIGHT OR WRONG OR JUDGMENT! It is about getting to the truth of the situation.

We can only blame for so long and the pattern repeats until we take responsibility for our role in the relationship. You can not move on until you learn what you need to learn about yourself and heal. with every relationship, it is important to look at what you learned about yourself. It makes no sense to blame the other party because they can not do anything to you without your consent. Find out why you consented to being treated in a way that you did not like. Heal that fear.

No these are not fun situations but it is the only way to get closer to who you really are. I hear form people all the time that they want a real love. A real relationship. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR! Having a real relationship is not about starring into each other's eyes expressing deep love. A real relationship is about healing your own pain through your experience with your partner. It is facing yourself by letting them serve as a mirror. It is letting love hurt and feeling fear and mistrust than healing it all.

This is what a spiritual relationship is. Remember you are waiting on you and only you when it comes to relationships. The other party will show when you are ready for them to show.

" INTUITIONS....My Divine Gift"

I want to give you some feedbacks ....

When i was 16 yrs old I was told by my mom's friend who a chruch choir member old lady that I have a gift of Intuitions. At that time, I didn't have a clue what was she talking about -Of course, I didn't really pay attention to that.

3 years ago A very gifted Reiki Master, Healer and Remote viewer i've met said the very same thing. She actually seen some events in my past that I took all the signs forgranted. She was right , I was in shocked! There were incidents in my past on my love and relationship that my Intuition was 100% accurate. She explained to me that my strong gifts are specializes in romance only. To be quite frankly, I wanted to wrong on this one due to it hurts when i look on my exes eyes ,i see visions, when i hold there hands i feel their guilt and grieve trying to hide things from me. Sometimes i can't stop myself from insisting the truth from them even though i already know the truth. It will be very hard for me to trust someone I knew they are lying to me without a doubt. Like I used to warned my exes ...there's nothing you can hide from me , I would know and feel it. Again, I was right. Funny even other men i've met before i see signs , visions and intuitions but i guess, i didn't really care as much as im suppose to that I just ignored those signs.

Well a year ago I was told by this person some interesting stuff so this year I've finally met her in person in CA . She is a Visionary , A Healer, A Spiritualist, Reiki Master, and Remote Viewer as well. Oppps did i mention, She is a Great lawyer too. I almost fell off my chair when she sees a very sad and dramatic events happened and actually feeling everything. She was getting a grasp of air and was telling me every smal details how the events occured that day in the past . Mind you without giving her any info at all. I mean , Nothing!

She then educated me about my gifts that my intuitions will get stronger as i reached my 40th bday. It will be slowly at first she said but i will also develop Visions as time goes by , and this is something I can't ignore ...where i see flashes of what's going to happen or flashbacks of what had happened already.
I must admit, she was right. Alot of times, I hated it because I don't want to be right. I have warned some people from work and friends this past 8 mos. on things and they come back to me and asked me how did i know????

One of the things i honestly don't like is seeing something or someone no one else can see ..Kinda like the sixth sense movie . Which at one point at work i had one incident and confirmed from janitors who had been working there for years about what i saw. I was in shocked and crying when i've learned that the person i saw used to work there and already passed away. I know this is gonna be difficult on me from now on ..I pray i won't have to see one again. Never again.This something I can't denied, hide and even ignored anymore.

You see . . . NOT everyone is a TRUTH seeker! There are many people who do unethical things . . . there might even be things that you do, that you may even bend the rules a little. We all have something we would rather not have others know about us. Like I don't go around telling everyone that I'm an Intuitive or see Visions. . . and sometimes, I really hope they don't read my blogs!

LOL!

So everyone has SOMETHING to hide it seems.

When you become more and more enlightened, your intuition or your sixth sense becomes more acute . . . NO, you are losing your mind!

But where do you get validation? How do you get CLARIFICATION . . . especially when it is unethical, or it is something that someone is trying to hide? Usually, a person will not give up their secret willingly . . . Sure, they might give up SOMEONE else's secret . . . but not their own skeleton . . . lol . . . .

There are very few truth seekers, I am finding in my own personal environment. Just because someone is kind one minute, does not mean that they are kind all the time. Just because someone tells you some TRUTH, does not mean that everything that comes out of their mouth is TRUTH.

If you are getting an ODD feeling . . . well, WRITE THAT DOWN!!!

I cannot emphasize more strongly to my friends how IMPORTANT it is that you have a personal journal. You NEED to be writing down you dreams, your impressions, your feelings. As you re-read what you have written, and time has gone by, you can go back and put a big "R" next to comments or impressions that you received, this big "R" stands for REAL!!!

If you find that your impression was NOT accurate . . . and there will be some of those, you can put a big "F" next to the paragraph, sentence, or impression that your wrote about. This is for FALSE . . . What you will be doing is honing in on your intuition! What kind of energy feeling did you have when you experienced your impressions?

Let me explain to you what happens when you become enlightened . . . It can be frightening! You can become paranoid of your situation, people, issues, things that are happening around you. There have been times, that I truly thought I was losing my mind!!! Because there was not a single person on the face of the earth that I could TRUST!!!

I isolated myself. But that didn't help . . . well in some ways it did, but it really was a waste of time . . . cause I got lonely, then when I finally did start mingling with people, and my intuition would tell me things . . . I would ignore the signs, cause I didn't want to be lonely!!!

Listen and obey your intuition!!! It is NOT a BAD thing!!! It is a GIFT!!! It takes courage to check yourself, and STRENGTH to stand up to the TRUTH.

Some people they have secrets, and being enlightened is like you can see right through people, but you really don't want to see right through people cause people want to keep their secrets . . . but you can't help it cause . . . well, your becoming enlightened!

Love and Peace,
Ann

LOL!!

It takes crazy to know crazy,

and I think I just went pro.


Peace,
Ann

Something to Ponder

You can't stop others to talk against you ,

but you can make them eat what they said...


"INSECURITY REIGNS IN THE UGLY HEART OF AN EMPTY BRAIN"..


Peace,
Ann

I Love the Way You Lie

I've heard this song before and honestly I listened to every single word and I thought it is Very good song that it actually relates in my situation- I even thought I hope my ex heard this song and realize that this is the Story of Us. Much to my surprised today after my Chiro appointment he sent me this song. (AHA!!)

So here's my thoughts about this song:

This song is about two people who are very much in love to each other but who allow their extreme jealously and anger slowly burn away at their relationship. I lived one myself, it was just insane and the worst part is that i was aware of it. basically same story relationship full of passion since day one.he had his flaws i know i have flaws myself we humans are not perfect but we loved each other either ways. and as passionate as our relationship was as well were our fights as intense!verbally intense! and after all the fighting then came the flashbacks of the few good times to together, then flashbacks turned into desire and finally there were both of us desperate to reach for each other again and believing all the "white lies" and the cycle continues.

We have all been there right? When the person you love does something to hurt you very bad and all you want to do is hurt them back as retribution. Yet in all of this effort, you are focusing all of your energy on this one person and they occupy 100% of your thought process. One could say this is a testament in and of itself for the love you have for them.

I knew it was a sick relationship as i said before i was aware of it the only difference is that the day that it turned physically i was strong enough to realize that sometimes its better to forget how you feel but remember what I deserve. Although I contributed some part of it but there's no Justification on physically abusing someone you love and who's there with you at all times.


But here's MY OWN TWIST:
(Actually it was advised to me by a good friend Sandy )

How can you make your relationship better? Don't focus on your partner, focus on you. You can't change your partner, but you can change how you react, and act towards your partner. You can make it a point to find the good in your partner and promise yourself that you will purposely look for something good about your partner. Say at least one nice thing every day, and for those of you who have to dig deep you do whatever is necessary. It may be something as simple as saying "I really appreciate when you...." or "I loved when you....". You can compliment them on their appearance, or perhaps something they did like take out the trash. Saying thank you and I love you can seem like work when the relationship is spiraling out of control.

There is not one single perfect person or relationship in this world. Yet there is one single person, yourself, who can bring about positive changes in your life. The world may be your oyster, but you are the pearl so treat yourself as such.

I do believed in second chances.. remember it takes two to tango...You prevent the abuse when you learn how to change the way you handle. Eventually in a long run you'll both learn and understand how to cope with your issues in your relationship.

Like I said in my other blogs - You can change things and still be in the relationship but you have to focus on yourself...and believe me everything else will follow.

Thanks for sending me this...

Have a Great Day!!

Sending You alot of LOVE and LIGHT,
Ann






Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife in my windpipe
I can't breathe, but I still fight while I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High off of love, drunk from her hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I suffocate
And right before I'm about to drown she resuscitates me
She fucking hates me and I love it
Wait, where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't, come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
'cause when it's going good, it's going great
I'm Superman with the wind in his back
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad, it's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snapped
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe when you're with 'em
You meet and neither one of you even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah, them chills, used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom in your words when you spit 'em
You push, pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down, pin 'em
So lost in the moments when you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it best to go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
'cause today, that was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records playin' over
But you promised her next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Now I know we said things, did things that we didn't mean
And we fall back into the same patterns, same routine
But your temper's just as bad as mine is
You're the same as me
When it comes to love you're just as blinded
Baby, please come back
It wasn't you, baby it was me
Maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is I love you too much to walk away though
Come inside, pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity in my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed I'll aim my fist at the drywall
Next time, there won't be no next time
I apologize even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed and set the house on fire

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Just what I need to Understand More Today

Last nite I was thinking ( i tend to do that sometimes.. not the best thing for me as i'm not a good at it) about a good friend who has been advising me lately. Some things she said made me look back at my own life.. so many things that she has been going thru the past several years that she's been talking to me made me realize just how much alike we are.. and how looking in the mirror i could see myself back a few years ago.

I started thinking about how many times there are people in our lives that aren't good for us, People that we would be so much better off if we walked away and how we really do know that those people aren't good for us but for alot of various reasons we think we can change them, or we think if we don't have them we'll grow old alone, we take blame for things they do and accept that we did somethin to deserve it when reality is.. Nobody deserves abuse, Nobody needs to settle for less than what they deserve and I also realized there are worse things in life than being alone..

I've had many relationships in my life with the " goog boys" who treats me really good,who respects me and sees me as a Beautiful Woman Inside and Out, but somehow I ended up marrying "the bad boys" believing that the love of a good woman would change them and I would be able to help them be the kind of person that they *claimed* they wanted to be. The end result tho was always the same.. you can't change anyone else, you can only change yourself. You can't change someone that doesn't want to be changed. You can't do all the work and expect to be successful. Relationships are partnerships. It takes 2 to tango. I found that out the hard way after spending so much time trying to do ALL the work and thinking that IF i did this and IF i did that everything would work out and we'd be happy and have that Happily ever after Fairy Tale we all want. Life doesn't work that way though unfortunately.

My last Marriage ended on Nov. 2007. With that I learned some of my biggest and hardest lessons. I learned that nobody can hurt me if i don't give them the power to hurt me, I learned that nobody can cause me to go into financial ruins if i don't allow them to put me there. I realized that all the problems and all the bad things that I played HALF in that.. the things he did he would never have been able to do them if i had not allowed it or given him the opportunity to do it. We are all in charge of our own lives and nobody can take that away from us if we don't give them permission to do it.

Anthony Robbins said: “Change occurs when the pain of not changing becomes greater than the pain of changing.” Change is definitely painful. It is much easier to stay stuck. But as someone else once said, “A rut is just a grave with the ends kicked out!”

Well, going to see my Chiro again today, it's been 5 days straight now and I will be still going there everyday til they fix my back and now my hips and legs are affecting all the pains. We will see...Im asking for you guys to keep me in your Prayers for my fast recovery.

God Bless You All....Happy Sunday!

Sending You all alot of LOVE and LIGHT,
Ann

( I hope you enjoy this music...I can't wait to go home in the Philippines and do Island Hopping with my Great friends, WHOAHH!!!)

How to get over " FEAR" in the Relationship and LIVE in the moment. YES, You can do it!

Relationships are NOT easy! I hope this little blog helps YOU to realize that fear can truly create so much negativity and ruin greatness, happiness and trust! (Just let your heart feel the love!) Embrace it! Love can set you free if you let it!


There are many things that I have learned through my own experiences throughout the years and the most recent "lesson" that I have learned is to release the "FEAR" and let go!

In order to truly be happy, we must truly be ourselves, without fear of judgment or that heaven forbid someone will disagree with our opinions. We are all here to learn to live and enjoy life but along the way we have to deal with disappointment and frustration that life just throws at us, whether it's self-created or something thrown at us by others. It is what it is and we have to learn to deal with all the emotions that God gave us and express freely without fear of judgment.

Fear causes so much stress... we fear losing someone we love because of past experiences and hurt caused by bad relationships or our very own poor choices. Dealing with fear is one of the most difficult burdens we have because it can truly be debilitating, sabotage good relationships and suppress who we truly are or who we're truly meant to be.

Ever felt like you didn't belong? Ever felt like you wanted to tuck your head and run? Ever felt ashamed because you're just not like everyone else? Ever felt betrayed or let down by others or even yourself? Surely... we all have, right? This is what fear does:

( I GOT THIS LIST FROM A FRIEND- IT'S VERY HELPFUL)

Here are some simple steps that may help you to overcome some of YOUR fears and learn to be more productive, happy and full of love, life and laughter!

~Let go of the past

~Do NOT hold others responsible for what you have allowed someone else to do you. You are accountable for that hurt, you must own it and get past it. Heal from it but do not blame or punish someone else.

~Live in the NOW... Look in the mirror and see WHO YOU really are, figure out what makes you happy and just DO IT!

~Don't be so agreeable, if you don't like something, say so. I promise you... it will make your life much easier and you'll find that you'll be right back out there living life and enjoying yourself and doing things that YOU like to do!

~Don't make excuses for not being able to let go, find a way to let go and just go for it!

~Don't expect someone else to make YOU happy! You are responsible for your own happiness and when you're happy, it's contagious... you'll find that others around you are happy also.

~Relax, remember that just because you've been hurt in the past, overlooked, beaten down, talked about or ridiculed -- doesn't mean that it's going to continue. Take control and just relax and live in the moment. (Stay away from people, places or things that bring you down or cause fear).

~Write down what you're afraid of and remind yourself that you're in control.
Don't put yourself in the same situation again and expect it to turn out differently.

~Get out of a bad relationship that continues to cause you grief and frustration or pain.
Choose your friends carefully

~Take time out each day to do something that YOU enjoy... eventually you'll catch yourself laughing and doing more things that bring you joy.

~Remember if you think it's going to be bad... it probably will not be as bad as you think. Don't FEAR something or someone new. Experience new things and learn to overcome what made you fearful in the first place.
LAUGH at yourself. Learn to just let go and laugh!

Stop talking about the negative and start LIVING the positive!
ONE LAST THING and a FINAL SUGGESTION:



" EXPECT LITTLE ...GIVE MUCH. FILL YOUR LIFE WITH LOVE AND JUST GO WITH THE FLOW. " is my new Virtue and I will start practicing it from now on. That has been the biggest downfall on me.and Im not ashamed to admit that.


May you let go of the fear from your past and learn to live in the now, freely and abundantly!

Sending You all a lot of LOVE and LIGHT,
Ann

Burn, Baby, Burn....

What is it in your closet that is worth holding onto? Just take a look around. I have discovered that I want a new wardrobe. I mean, entirely new. Therefore, my decision is to throw everything out and wait for the Universe to direct me to NEW! "Friends" that are no more a "friend" to me than the raccoons under my porch are included in the trash pile. "Anger" that doesn't serve me- well, that obviously needs to go. "Good Memories" I need to hang on to - those will be in the 'save' pile. "Regrets" - oh, come on, who really needs those? Toss that into the trash with the "so-called-friends" pile. "Disappointments" - trash. So what? I was disappointed a few times. I'm over it. "Joyful times" - obvious 'SAVE'. Remembering the FEELING of "joy" and the flutter it gives, gotta save that!

Clear the clutter in your mind. Determine what is trash, and what should be saved. It's so much easier to breathe, to think clear when there's nothing that is taking up space that doesn't need to be there. Take out the trash and burn it. That's something that will feel GOOD!

Have a Great Weekend!!


Sending you all alot of LOVE and LIGHT,
Ann

TGIF.... 9/10/10

"NO ONE CAN CHANGE THE PAST....

ONLY THE HOLD IT HAS ON YOU."

Wooahh!!! Something has been bothering me for couple of days now and it's about some " stupid" actions or accusations i made to someone. I should have listened to my good and positive advisors who had been telling me it's all depends on me now, is the exact words.

See i was doing pretty good i should say going through my daily life and making myself busy about this big move and things needs to get done before we leave. For some reason being bored and lonely the other day and I spoke to a very negative advisor who basically poisoned my head telling me crap!! I shouldn't base my life on someone's readings.

Then i called my ex talked about the move and how our daughter doing in school.
Well , i should have known better that sometimes he just say stinky words ( Hurtful for me it is at least ) but he just like that...he says things without thinking or not even mean anything and then later he feels like a jack ass!! I should have hang up the phone that's probably the smart thing to do. But instead NO ...since my head is already polluted with bullshit from the negative advisor i talked to - I was already hyped up , here goes my un never ending questions/ accusations attack ...( how childish and stupid- I must admit to that!) and of course i didn't end up the way i wanted to be...peace and harmony :(


Although i made it this far from the old me - but still somethings triggers me for getting so irrate!! I should have more patient to handle it a little better. But i didn't that day.

Well the lessons i still need to learn is to LET GO COMPLETELY OF ALL THE BAGGAGE and I NEED TO START CLEANING ALL THE CLUTTER in my life. To be able to ACCEPT EVERYTHING COMPLETELY without anymore drama. Who wants it anyways?? .. I know I've been there and done that- guilty as charged ! But I cannot changed the past - holding on with those dirty laundry wont do me good as a person anymore. I just need to really take it to the heart that I HAVE TO CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY RATHER THAN BEING RIGHT all the time. I also need to FORGIVE myself then release and let go.

I am only speaking for myself , he on the other hand I know, and he knows that he has his own closet to clean up as well. I love him with all my heart but i can't make him do what i want him to do right there and then, to love me , to want me ... Too many painful pasts on both of us ...we get the best of each other on some stupid little things. WE both made mistakes - we both have to go on our own journey- and learn to fight our own demons. It's not always gonna be easy but we both just need to see the big picture... that there are children involved as well.

I DO BELIEVE THAT ONLY IN GOD'S DIVINE TIMING THAT THINGS WILL BE BETTER... and It will.


" OUR emotions are the slaves to our thoughts, and WE are the slave to our emotions."

Today , Is suppose to be our 5th Wedding Anniversary (If we didn't get divorced of course!) But hey , it's ok to reminisce.
Well, I can say is , I am so proud of him taking really good care of our daughter Aisha in CA with him right now. I know she's a handful for him due to his work schedules. But hey, He gets to come home to his Princess, the very best thing that ever happened to his Life.

Have a Safe Weekend Guys!!!

Love and Light,
Ann

Emotional or Physical - Is YOUR Relationship an Abusive one?

Emotional or Physical - Is YOUR Relationship an Abusive one?
To consider whether your partner emotionally abuses you, look at the information available on physical abusers. The patterns are similar:

COMMON CHARACTERISTICS OF ABUSERS
(adapted)

* He was verbally abused as a child, or witnessed it in his own family.

* He has an explosive temper, triggered by minor frustrations and arguments.

* Abusers are extremely possessive and jealous. They experience an intense desire to control their mates.

* His sense of masculinity depends on the woman's dependency upon him. He feels like a man only if his partner is totally submissive and dependent on him.

* Abusers often have superficial relationships with other people. Their primary, if not exclusive, relationship is with their wife/girlfriend.

* He has low self-esteem.

* He has rigid expectations of marriage (or partnership) and will not compromise. He expects her to behave according to his expectations of what a wife should be like; often the way his parents' marriage was, or its opposite. He demands that she change to accommodate his expectations.

* He has a great capacity for self-deception. He projects the blame for his relationship difficulties onto his partner. He would not be drunk if she didn't nag him so much. He wouldn't get angry if only she would do what she's supposed to do. He denies the need for counseling because there's nothing wrong with him. Or he agrees to get counseling and then avoids it or makes excuses to not follow through. He might not want her to get counseling because, he reasons, she wouldn't have any problems if she only turned to him.

* He may be described as having a dual personality -- he is either charming or exceptionally cruel. He is selfish or generous depending on his mood.

* A major characteristic of abusers is their capacity to deceive others. He can be cool, calm, charming and convincing: a con man.

* The mate is usually a symbol. The abuser doesn't relate to his partner as a person in her own right, but as a symbol of a significant other. This is especially true when he's angry. He assumes that she is thinking, feeling, or acting like that significant other -- often his mother.

EFFECTS
OF LONG-TERM EMOTIONAL & VERBAL ABUSE
ON THE VICTIM

Isolation from others - Low self-esteem - Depression - Emotional problems - Illness - Increased alcohol or drug use - Withdrawal from real life into an Internet alternative reality

How can you.... ( A Friend's Blog )

welcome a new relationship into your life when you have not let go of other relationships in your life? We attract to ourselves what we are, who we are, .....so if we are still caught up with another emotionally, and have not let go of that person, do you expect the new person coming in to be baggage free when you are clearly NOT? If we are still concerned with what the other person is doing, thinking or when they are going to call us, you are NOT free emotionally, so do not lie to yourself and others that you are over your past relationship if you clearly are not.

When you are giving rent free space to another how can you even think you are not giving off that vibe on some level? Do not fool yourself, as you may not be able to fool the new person coming in, they may not be able to put their finger on it but they sense that something is off and it may sabotage and or limit your new potential relationship. So if you want someone who truly IS available the best thing you can to is to BE available yourself, and not lying to yourself or others about it, but being available truly emotionally and physically is the only way to truly start off something that could truly be something as opposed to another false start that YOU played a major part in sabotaging.....


So try to think of a new relationship as a plane journey, you are only allowed so much baggage and any more you will be charged for and pay for. So clean out that baggage, pack lightly and only carry with you what you have gained from any previous relationships that's a much lighter load :-)

EAT~PRAY~LOVE (A must See movie and A must read blog)

"To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced life."

I Fell in love with this movie, I will definitely buy the DVD and watch it all night long. One of My favorite quote was "I am a woman searching for a word" because that is what I am at this point in my life. This movie truly resonated with me. I intend to buy the book to mark all of the amazing quotes. It spoke to me very deeply. When Something is Missing in your Life...RISK EVERTYHING ...and LET YOURSELF GO Becuase the BEST Still Yet to Come. A Woman's Journey in Life where YOUR HOPE, YOUR TRUTH, YOUR FAITH ,AND YOUR COURAGE Is The Only POWER TO let go with the familiar. When you finally give up striving, you will be left with what you have been striving for.

JUST BELIEVE!

" 'Tis better to live your own life imperfectly than to imitate someone else's perfectly".

I've been some rough roads in Life at an early age...although I can't complain beacuse the best part of all that i have travelled in so many places by myself. I Love Adventure- The Feeling of not knowing ...Just DO IT! Excites Me!!! At this point of my life, I Now finally see what it is I really WANT in My life. I would love to start Travelling again and See the world. I told my daughter that I'm thinking to built a small home by the beach back in the Philippines or Bali perhaps someday. I was told many times that i have some Spiritual gifts " Intuitive" , I would love to study it and learn more how to meditate and other ways of Healing.
I will not let my Life hangin' on by Fear, I will Let go and Experience my Power. When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

When We stop wanting, the energy is released, We can turn it towards ourself again, We can become more aware of OURSELF, right there at center of existence. Then existence can flow again naturally, and We can gracefully receive what comes our way.

The movie is also about Fighthing your Own demons-One needs to FORGIVE YOURSELF FIRST , In order to find yourself, your Inner Peace and to Open your heart again in order to find the Love you deserve and longin' for.

"I remember an old catholic joke about a man who spent his whole life going to a church every day and prayed to the statue of a great saint begging "please, please, please, let me win the lottery." Finally the exasperated statue comes to life and looks down at the begging man and says "my son, please, please, please, buy a ticket." So now I get the joke."

God's not interested in watching a performance of how a spiritual person looks and behaves. God dwells within me...as me.

Sending You All A lot of LOVE and LIGHT,
Ann


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ABOUT THE MOVIE...

'Eat Pray Love,' is an inspirational drama based on Elizabeth (Liz) Gilbert's best-selling memoir. Liz played by Julia Roberts is a woman who, on the surface, has it all - a career, a husband and new home. However, she realizes that she no longer has a thirst for life. After a bitter divorce, she decides to journey overseas to Italy, India and Indonesia to find rediscover the true meaning of herself and life. 'Eat Pray Love' is an inspiring story and the quotes are enough to melt your heart.

Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts) is a writer in Manhattan whose life is safe and without passion. Her milquetoast husband Stephen (Billy Crudup) is drifting every bit as much as she is, but unlike Liz, he's in denial. When in the middle of the night, they both wake up and he tells her "I don't want to go to Aruba," her response is simply "I don't want to be married." And with that, her story, "Eat Pray Love" (directed by Ryan Murphy), really begins.

A chameleon, Liz immediately dives into another relationship, this time with David (James Franco, trying too hard), a twenty-something actor/yogi, who is just as happy to settle for unhappiness as Stephen is. As she deals with her messy divorce - which her ex is by now pathetically resisting - she redefines herself as David's girlfriend, increasingly aware of her restlessness.

David said when they were in bed and Liz was crying. He was saying something about how they fight all the time and never have sex and just to live unhappy with each other rather then being alone

" I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long. I will stay with you. If you need the medication again, go ahead and take it—I will love you through that, as well. If you don’t need the medication, I will love you, too. There’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you. I am stronger than Depression and Braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me. "


Coming from other culture We Believed as the Italians believed as well the saying, " THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING ".

Quote from the movie: But you don't know pleasure. You have to be told you've earned it. You see a commercial that says: 'It's Miller Time!' And you say, That's right, now I'm going to buy a six pack. And then drink the whole thing and wake up the next morning and you feel terrible. But an Italian doesn't need to be told. He walks by a sign that says: You deserve a break today. And he says, Yes, I know. That's why I'm planning on taking a break at noon to go over to your house and sleep


GREAT MOVIE QUOTES:

“As smoking is to the lungs, so is resentment to the soul; even one puff is bad for you.”

If you could clear you all that space in your mind, you would have a doorway. And you know what the universe would do? Rush in."

"You're going to have to learn to select your thoughts the same way you select your clothes every day. Now that's a power that you can cultivate. You want to come here and you want to control your life so bad work on the mind, and I don't think you should be trying to control a thing because if you can't master your thoughts you are in trouble forever."

Balance is not letting anyone love you less than you love yourself."

"Do not look at the world through your head; look at it through your heart."

"Having a baby is like having a tattoo on your face. You kind of want to be committed."

“Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”





I STILL BELIEVE

I’ve been looking for a light
At the end of this tunnel
I’ve been searching for a sign
To lead me home

Too many endless nights
Of sorrow
But on the other side of this
I know that my heart will live

I never saw a man that walked on the water
I never met a man that walked on the water
But I still believe

I don’t really know what tomorrow will bring
But I’m open to all possibilities
‘Cause I still believe

And the more I live my life
The lesser I question
All the things I just can’t see
Right in front of my eyes
So I take that leap of faith
And learn a few lessons
Time showed me that
What you give is what you get

I never saw a man that walked on the water
I never met a man that walked on the water
But I still believe

I don’t know the answer to my prayer
But I keep kneeling down like somebody is there
‘Cause I still believe

(Now, listen)
Well, I guess I could give up
‘Cause there are days I wanna run away
From everything
But what good would that do for me

‘Cause I, I, I still believe

I never saw a man that walked on the water
I never met a man that walked on the water
But I still believe

I never saw a man that walked on the water
I never met a man that walked on the water
But I still believe

I don’t really know what tomorrow will bring
But I’m open to all possibilities
‘Cause I still believe

I never saw a man, never saw a man, never saw a man,
Who walked on the water
I never saw a man, never saw a man, never saw a man,
But I, but I, but I believe
But I, but I, but I believe
But I, but I, but I believe

Hmmm...Should I Stay....or Should I Go?

SELF love. Self love isn't being vain or egotistical, it's a matter of drawing boundaries to what is and what isn't acceptable to you. The more you draw boundaries around your heart, the more you love yourself. You know how you're being treated in a relationship- is the behavior stirring up feelings of anger, or feelings of reaffirming how much you are adored? The "Self" knows the difference, but may argue with you because the "Ego Self" is making excuses for certain behaviors.


Does he/she call you when promised, or are you left wondering why? In this day and age of instant messaging, cell phones, blackberries, and all kinds of communication devices is there an excuse for not sending a simple "hi, am thinking of you" or "how's your day?"


Does he/she not make solid plans with you, but instead, says "sure, MAYBE we can get together?" (you better make other plans, because this is a major red flag you're "Plan B").


Does he/she surf the internet looking for something, not necessarily 'better' but just LOOK at what's 'out there'? (In other words, is your significant "other" making you feel "insignificant"?)


All of the above are things you COULD make excuses for the behavior, but what is it that your heart KNOWS that your head refuses to BELIEVE? We ALL believe in Love and want someone to share our lives with, but are YOU the only one participating in your relationship? When is it time to drop the fear of not having someone in your life that isn't "present" with you, so that you can ALLOW someone that IS present to share with you?

All things in good time. Actually, I call it divine time. When you are ready to put boundaries on what IS and what ISN'T acceptable behavior to YOUR standards, then you will be in a space where you WILL make the appropriate decision that will be YOUR choice...


This is the day that beauty can truly rise and shine within you. Just believe that this day will bring you peace, joy, friendship and inner peace


Love and Peace,
Ann