Why is so He Inconsistent and Why do you take him Back???

( My hometown..... I miss it so much!!)


What do you do when your man pulls back or is inconsistent? It drives you nuts but regardless how many times you have yelled, cried or screamed; he continues to do it! Why does he do it and how do you get it to stop?

The answer is actually simple. If a man feels there is an open door 'in and out of your life' - he'll take it. A man comes in and out of your life for one reason; because you ALLOW it. 'Stop making it so easy for him!'

When he pulls back and you don't hear from him for days, weeks or God forbid - months, you labor almost every day thinking about him and trying to get him back. When he is being inconsistent or inattentive the absolute WORST thing you can do is call, text or email him. That, in effect, rewards his negative behavior. When he finally contacts you - you are ecstatic! You are anxious to speak to him. You change your plans, you free your time, you wait.. and wait.. and wait. When he finally does contact you, you may yell, scream or cry and make him promise not to do it again, but he keeps repeating this pattern.. over and over again.. until YOU pull in the reigns and say 'enough is enough'.

Why does he do this? Well, it is simple. When you reward his bad behavior with 'attention' and 'telling him how much you care and desire him' you reward him for being inconsiderate to you. When he ends up getting what he wants from you - be it sex, attention, words of adoration, (or whatever drives him) that gives him his 'fix'.. so he takes it and then goes back to being inconsistent.

The WORST mistake you can make is to anxiously welcome him back and allow the relationship to go back to where it was BEFORE he disappeared. Again, that reinforces the negative behavior and you make it waaaaaaaay to easy for him. He begins to subconsciously feel that being inconsistent is the best way to get attention from you. You actually 'train him' to respond that way.... You Spoiled him!! He gets the attention he needs from you when he is being inconsistent and that drives him to do it.

Now, let's look at the flip-side. Some women don't put up with it. If they encounter a man that is inconsistent - after the first time he 'disappears' when they 're-appear'. Some woman will just dump this kind of behavior in a heart Beat!!! Who wants to be treated that way???? The more you allow him to do this to you , the more he Disrespect you as a Person and Inconsiderate of your feelings!! It's time to STAND UP and LOVE YOURSELF.

Think about karma. It's not just 'what goes around comes around,' but knowing that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Bring your highest intentions when dealing with others and your love life will blossom.

If your Man Truly Loves you , Wants you and Cares for your Feelings then he will realized what he has done and Put an effort to do the right thing, Give him a deadline in your mind and If by that time he has not change or done anything right ...Then you got your answers, It's time to start to drifting away! Besides, You are not his " Security Blanket!" And even though love does not have set growth time lines…if you find yourself exhausted after years of investing into a relationship that doesn’t feel like it’s going anywhere, chances are it isn’t. It might be time to get out!



Peace To All,
Ann
" Never Give Up on things that makes You Smile :) "